I randomly asked a girlfriend to tell me the first thing that came to her mind when I say "female condom". Her response was a very defensive look and the question: "Why did you ask me that?"
Double standards:
Here is what I do not get... Kenyans are sexually active. Those who are sensible know that they need to use protection. And while it's totally okay for a man to walk into a supermarket and buy condoms, when a woman does it she's considered a slut. It's a double standard.
I once heard an annoying man call in to a radio station and say that women should never buy condoms. Why? Because this barbaric being believed that women who buy condoms are, in his words, "loose" - or what I termed earlier: "a slut". It seems that when it comes to the quenching of sexual desires, some are more equal than others.
Where are the female condoms?
The first time I ever saw a female condom was six years ago when my cousin demonstrated to me how to use one. Since that time I have never seen a female condom sold in a supermarket. The only other time I have seen female condoms is when I spent a day with a female sex worker. Her and her colleagues are supplied by NGOs and the government-run National AIDS and STI Control Programme (NASCOP).
Last year Betty Murungi, Kenya's Minister for Special Programmes, stated that women should add female condoms to their grooming routine. "In our handbags, we must have the powder, the lipstick, and the female condom," she announced after the 2012 World AIDS conference. Great! Murungi also went on to say that the ministry will strive to do two things: make female condoms more affordable and available. Both promises still need to happen.
Male vs female condoms:
It's estimated that there will be 144 million male condoms shipped into Kenya this year, against 1.7 million female condoms. I am yet to walk into a supermarket and see female condoms. However I can give you a list the length of my arm of the different male condom brands I can find.
I asked a couple of other friends if they have ever used, or know where to access, female condoms. Except for one friend whose office used to supply female condoms but then stopped, they all just use the usual male condom. If you do come across a female condom at the pharmacy it is three times the price of the male condom. You do not need to be a genius to know why women do not buy them.
But even if we would have an equal number of female condoms at affordable prices, would women actually buy them? We live in a society that over-chastises women. I don't understand this. There are a lot of heterosexual men having sex out there. One can only assume they are having this sex with heterosexual women. So shouldn't women have the same right and opportunity to choose their preferred contraception?
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